Based on Italy 1974 - Si
How he drives me mad, eating crisps in bed,
He drives me insane, with his TV game,
Makes me go berserk, with his wicked smirk.
Even Tom, our cat, went and packed his bag,
Now waits by the door, can not take no more.
No more - we must go make a - trip to Brighton,
There’s a pretty sight to see
Now he’s floating in the sea,
With the seagulls he is crying,
Looks like he smiles at me.
Ain’t it sweet? He waves at me!
Drifting in a bed of seaweed,
He looks like Crab Louis.
Makes me worry ‘bout his diet,
Cause he likes his food saltfree.
No, they dragged him out, I could scream and shout,
They say he’s secure, fucking amateurs!
Had my plan a flaw? Is this Murphy’s law?
I eat crisps in bed, must be going mad.
All is like before, just can’t stand no more.
No more - we must go make a - trip to Saltburn.
As you know it’s by the sea.
Now he’s drowning in the sea,
Begging me to throw a lifeline,
Calling me “scurvy beast”,
Makes me wonder if he’s sneezing,
Cause he has lacks Vitamin C.
(Easy just like A-B-C)
(If they ask now where he‘s gone to)
(He's swallowed here by the sea)
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