If I'm modest
I would say that I'm
Quite a goodlooking man
But I am afraid
That the ladies
Thinks I'm a cheap sedan
It is so depressing
Me who is so kind
I am maybe guessing
Ladies must be blind
Unhappy unhappy unhappy you see
Unhappy unhappy unhap-happy me
So I tried
Botox and viagra
Facelifts, feng shui and drugs
Learned to cook
Took courses in Braille
An expert in giving hugs
The ladies adored it
Said I looked divine
I longed for the last pit
To be a nasty swine
So I wined and dined
With the ladies
Thought they were up for play
When I tried to kiss on the boobies
They laughed
You naughty gay
Unhappy unhappy unhappy you see
Unhappy unhappy unhap-happy me
