The pants have done it – what a triumph, what a scene!
It’s a day I’m sure I never will forget
You voted generously for a tale obscene
Still, I’m left with one unquenchable regret
Now the contest is all done, I must admit
Here’s the song I really wanted to submit:
I farted! I farted!
I let one slip out
Rancid and fetid and vile
I farted! I farted!
With traces of sprout
’nough to make you run a mile
Sure, we’ve been here before now
Many times a trump’s been heard
But now I want to sing it high and proud:
I farted! I farted!
A sound quite absurd
Brassy and brazen and loud
Yet I chickened out lamely, went for something more mundane
Then I sat and waited, calm, until the voting night
All the midgets and pooflies were showered with acclaim
And now it’s time - my time! - to put things right
Listen, don’t get me wrong now
’Cause I’m thrilled to bits, for sure
But farting, you see, is more my style
I farted! I farted!
A flatulent roar
Trembling and tainted with bile
I farted! I farted!
I don’t mean to bore
Now that your votes have been dealt
I farted! I farted!
Like never before
So hard it blew off my belt
A smell that could make concrete melt
Ein Pups klingt hinaus in die Welt!