Mmm... every night I see a locust, every time my eyes re-focus
Every time I zip my nightie, I see little yellow fly-things...

Hey locust! There you are in my bedclothes
Now you've jumped on my headphones
Nice to see you today - wohohoh

Hey locust! Can you listen to podcasts?
Maybe you've got a thorax? I like you anyway

Every time I see my locust, at once I stop all my smoking
Rushing over fields so fast, over such a long distance

Changing colour, grassy hopper
And swarming like a mini-rocker
They do eat a lot, and multiply
And are edible if you just try

Hey locust! Once again in my bedclothes
Please avoid my tinned pesto
What's your name, mini-pet? Wohohoh

Hey locust! Hope you like nibbling doughnuts
Like a child amongst grown-ups
But with adult-like moves

Jumping to the left and to the right
Locust in my bedroom and my tights
Maybe I should feed you something nice
Like a slice of pear or grain of rice

Nimble little creature of the night
Wonder if you tickle or you bite
Or if poppy music is your style
After jumping on my washing pile

Hey locust! There's no way that you're bogus
'Cos you're moving all over
My bare legs and my arms - wohohoh

Another! I've just spotted another...
Locust there in my mustard!
Make it jump far away! Yeah, alright, I'm calm now...

It's the riddle of locusts, these creatures we know must
So many in number, and types all asunder
With changing behaviour and colours like make-up
Chameleon morphing, just little, not poor things

They are good guys, happy and serene,
Though jumping so fast and then making someone scream
Sticklike limbs and eyes like plasticine
The small animals who are the nimble queens

Hey locusts! We are loving your species
Can't you see it's so easy
Dancing with all the bugs - wohohoh..

Hey locust! Why are you on my pencil?
Now I need no more benzo
'Cos you've made me sedate

Yeah, come on, yeah
Locust One
Two thousand of them, yeah
The locust compendium
Swinging from a pendulum - yeah
Locust One, baby
Can you feel me...there on your legs?